Of Snowflakes and Reindeer
by catey123
Summary: Followup fic to It Must have been the Merlot. Christmas is coming and Flynn wants to make his feelings known for Brenda. Will she be ready to start dating yet? Three chapters, complete story.
1. Chapter 1

Andy Flynn was looking at various Christmas displays, looking for a gift for Brenda Leigh Johnson. He didn't know why he was looking for a gift for her, he'd never done so before. But since Halloween, when she'd agreed that they could start dating in awhile, once she'd gotten some things straightened out in her life, they'd become closer. Even though they hadn't officially even had a date yet, Andy felt like she was the special woman in his life.

Andy didn't want to push her into a date, he knew he had to take things a step at a time with her. However, since they'd kissed on Halloween, he'd yearned for more. Maybe deep down, he thought getting her a gift would prove to her that his intentions were sincere, and not just a play to get into bed with her. She'd been friendly enough, not embarrassed that they'd kissed or that she'd agreed to go out with him sometime in the future. Things weren't awkward between them, though he'd feared they might be, considering their first kiss had only occurred cause she was drunk. And that's how he found himself in a mall, looking for a gift to give her, to show her that he still wanted to go out with her, that he wanted something more than just friendship.

He hadn't had good luck in buying gifts for women. When he was married, he'd just get his wife to give him a list of things she might have wanted and picked something from that. For Brenda, however, he wanted to find something special, to show her that he thought she was special. He'd rejected perfume as to impersonal, besides, he never knew what kind she might like. Ditto for chocolates and candy. Lingerie was too intimate, considering they weren't even officially dating as of yet. Anything related to technology was pretty much out, he knew she wasn't comfortable with electronics. As he wandered along, he came to a stop in front of a jewelry store. Scanning the items, he was struck by one item in particular.

It was a pendant of a snowflake, little diamonds sparkling in the lights of the mall. It was delicate and small, and he had no idea why he suddenly decided that that was the gift for Brenda. It wasn't like she was a fan of snow, but the necklace was beautiful in its simplicity. He made up his mind to buy it for her, no matter the cost. He didn't know how he felt about that, that the decision had come to him so easily. All he knew about snowflakes was the fact that each one was unique and individual, no two alike. That described Brenda to a T. There was no one else like her.

As he purchased the gift, he deeply hoped she'd like and accept it. He didn't want her to reject it, reject him. He just knew he was tired of waiting and hoping they could go forward in their relationship. He smiled as he tucked the package into his inside coat pocket, hoping against hope that come Christmas, Brenda Leigh Johnson would be his.


	2. Chapter 2

Brenda cruised through the mall, not really wanting to be there, but had to find some gifts for her parents for Christmas. She was flying to Atlanta, taking the time finally to go visit them for Christmas, for a real, honest visit, unlike the last time she'd went. She was flying out on Boxing Day, missing Christmas actually, but at least she was going. She finally settled on a sweater for her mother, she'd found a lovely one that she liked and hoped her mother would too. As she looked through shop windows for something for her dad, her eyes settled on some ties in a window. The ties made her think of Andy Flynn.

At that, she sighed. She didn't know what to do about him. She'd initiated a kiss with him on Halloween, promising him a chance to start dating in the future, and instead, she'd stalled. She did want to go out with him, she did. At the same time, she didn't know what to do about it. Relationships with team members were frowned upon, more so because she was a Deputy Chief and he was her Lt. It wasn't impossible, just not something that was looked upon favourably. So, if she went ahead and dated him, she left herself open to trouble within the department. As much as she liked him, and she did, it scared her. Her job was all she had left since Fritz had left.

Still, the thought of being with Flynn fascinated her. Even when they'd once hated one another, there had been something there. She'd felt something for him even back then, especially when he'd mentioned she had great legs. And if she were honest, some days she wore heels or skirts specifically to see if she could get a reaction out of him. She knew he still looked. She looked at the ties in the window again and thought about getting him one. She suddenly had a very clear vision of herself grabbing one of those ties he loved to wear so much and pulling him to her to kiss him. The thought of that startled her.

Brenda wandered over to a bench across from the window and sat down. Should she buy him a gift? Would it be appropriate? It would be just a tie, after all. Still, the image that had seared into her brain, of kissing him once again, it gave her a thrill. She wanted to kiss him and wanted to go forward in some kind of relationship with him. To hell with the consequences. Her feelings for him had grown a lot in the last while, as they'd danced around each other, neither wanting to scare the other off. If she were honest, she was starting to fall for him, she had "very strong feelings" for him. They'd talk after work, joke, walk, basically were doing all the things that people who dated each other did, yet they weren't dating. It left her confused.

She got up from the bench and walked into the store where the ties were. There were so many, terrific materials, colours, patterns to choose from. Flynn was always so well-dressed, so put together. She wondered if he would like what she bought him. The concern that he'd like the ties bothered her more than whether her parents would like the gifts that she got them. In the end, she couldn't buy just one. She ended up buying four ties of varying patterns and colours, with matching pocket squares. And as a joke, she bought a reindeer tie, wondering what he would think of it. Five ties in total for a man who she wasn't even officially dating. Again, she sighed. She had the store wrap them up and Brenda found herself happy. She hoped the gift would signal to him that she was ready to move forward, ready to start a relationship. That she liked him a whole lot more than she could say, that it was bordering on something more.

Brenda walked out of the store with a smile on her face, happy she'd finally decided to move on with things. All she had left to do was figure out when to give him the gift and finally, finally begin something new. This just may turn out to be a great Christmas after all, she thought. Maybe, just maybe, she might get what she really did want for Christmas.


	3. Chapter 3

Andy Flynn stood outside Brenda Leigh Johnson's door, for the life of him, feeling like a schoolboy going on his first date. The woman who lived there had promised that they could date when she was ready and he still couldn't believe that she'd agreed to go out with him. But waiting patiently had finally gotten to him, and he had felt the need to see her, plead his case to go out with her. The waiting had been interminable and he found his feelings for her growing stronger and stronger. Even though she wasn't his, not yet, he'd fallen for her big time. He'd even gone as far as to buy her a Christmas gift, had it tucked safely in the inside pocket of his trench coat but the opportunity to give it to her never presented itself. So, he'd showed up here, in what he seen as another attempt to go forward, to let her know how much he felt for her. Finally, he knocked softly, his breath caught in his throat. God, what was he doing there?, he thought to himself. She hadn't even invited him, not tonight, but there he was. He was there for her.

He waited there as the seconds passed by, wondering if she was really alone, if she was really passing the Christmas alone. She'd been going to fly to Georgia for Christmas, but the plans had fallen through, and she was spending Christmas alone, not going until Boxing Day. He didn't know what to do after that seed of doubt was planted inside of him. Shouldn't he believe in everything, trust everything after the kiss she deliberately gave him on Halloween? But why was she taking so long to open the door? Was he interrupting something? Maybe she'd reunited with her husband.

He was ready to go, really. He had changed his mind and called himself stupid several times. His hands were securely stuck inside his trench coat pockets, preventing them from twisting nervously. But then she opened the door.

She stood there, looking at him, surprised to see Andy at that hour. And he stood there too, mute. Neither said anything and she just stared at Andy. She looked him directly in the eye and didn't speak a single word.

She was wearing a long sleeved purple shirt and plaid sweatpants. Her hair was still wet from the shower she had obviously taken. Andy didn't know how she did it, looking just as beautiful like that as when she was all made up. Her natural beauty showed and it was simply irresistible no matter what clothes she was in. She was always beautiful.

He stared at her; the desire for her being with him growing stronger and bigger. He wanted her. He wanted her to be his. His girl who would always be there. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, feel her skin against his. He wanted to run his fingers through her hair, feeling the soft silkiness against his skin. He wanted to feel the happiness she brought him all the time. He wanted... he wanted something more than a friendship between them.

And he was sure he was close to getting it.

A sweet, lovely smile crept up on her face and she shined it on him. Only him, and God, it was so wonderful. He raised his head and met her gaze and couldn't stop himself from forming his own smile. "What are you doing here?" She asked softly and curious.

"I don't know." He answered. What was he doing there? Was he there to know why she had kissed him? Was he there to just check on her? Was he there to see if she was really alone? He didn't know, he thought again and shrugged to her in response. She didn't say a word, didn't refute, she just opened her door wider and let him in.

Andy felt nervous, he didn't know why but he felt really nervous. He didn't know what he was doing there anymore. "Take your coat off." She said softly again, her mouth so close to him that he felt her soft breath in his ear. He turned to face her quicker than he intended causing her to look quizzically at him.

He chuckled at how ridiculous he was being and she chuckled too and, he thought that that sound never stopped amazing him. As he was taking off his coat, he remembered something and reached inside its pocket for a small box. Brenda eyed him curiously as she hung the coat and he smiled mysteriously at her.

"Shouldn't you be with your kids?"

"I was. It's late, it was time for me to leave." He shrugged again incapable of telling her the real reason he was there. The fact was he couldn't stay away from her. He just couldn't. Whenever she was there, he felt something, the way he'd never been before. He was more than happy, she was something that made him feel so good... the part he always wanted to be there. And there she was, both at the same place, maybe the same page.

"Andy?"

"Yeah?" She giggled, he didn't know why, but she giggled and it was like magic, it was like a... he didn't know some kind of good feeling he couldn't describe. His eyes were set on her. She took his breath away and managed to find a spot inside of him. He'd never felt this. Not even with either of his wives, or the girlfriends over the years that he'd been with. It was just her.

"What?"

She shook her head, still smiling, her wet hair hanging about her head. "Seems you're very quiet tonight."

He smiled back. He couldn't help it. He almost forgot about the present he had bought for her. "It's for you." he said as he handed her the box.

She gingerly took it, eying him curiously. "You really shouldn't have."

"I know, but I seen it and it just reminded me of you for some reason."

She smiled happily, he seen it, she was happy he'd brought her a present. And for the first time, he was glad he hadn't followed the rules. She opened it, ripping the paper like a child excited on Christmas morning and her eyes widened when she saw what was in the box.

"Andy..." her voice soft, as if words were failing her. "You didn't need to." She looked up at him, a twinkle in her eyes. A smile formed across her face. She showed delight in her features. Did she think she could fool him?

"Of course I needed to." He stepped close and took the shining silver necklace from her hands and put it around her neck. He'd bought it at a jewelery store, he didn't know why, he just did. He was passing by the store, when something caught his eye. A beautiful necklace, shaped like a snowflake, diamonds gleaming from it. It was really small but it was beautiful. It just screamed "Brenda". Like a snowflake, there was no one like Brenda, she was a unique woman. Christmas was there and he'd bought the necklace before he knew it.

What was he thinking? He'd bought jewelry for someone who wasn't even his girlfriend. It had been expensive but worth it. To see the twinkle in her eyes, it was worth it. Brenda was smiling to herself, as if she was thinking about what had just happened. Her fingers were twined around the necklace and her eyes were locked with his.

He looked at her and saw the happiness in her eyes, the joy she felt just by the fact that he was there with her and she wasn't going to spend Christmas alone after all. Knowing what he felt about her, what the simple gift had meant to her filled him with warmth, especially to his heart.

"Thank you." She whispered and stood closer to him, so close that he felt her warmth against his body. She reached for his hand and gently took it, locking them together. He was so surprised by that gesture, he didn't notice her lips over his, kissing him so softly he almost didn't feel it. And as soon as she'd started the kiss, she'd ended it.

Their eyes locked again when she pulled away and he wanted to tell her right there. Tell her that he loved her with every bit of his heart and soul. Tell her that he wanted to be with her. Tell her that he'd fallen for her. Tell her everything, but he couldn't form the words.

The butterflies she gave him came back. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. He didn't blink even once. He thought he looked stupid, standing there, just gazing at her. It was just a surprise, the kiss. Just like that, she'd kissed him again, without him expecting it.

"I have something for you too." She said almost shyly.

"You do?" he asked, somehow making the words come out.

"I do." She smiled and let go of his hand to walk to her bedroom. She came back five seconds later, carrying something in her hands. "It's really stupid. After what you gave me, you'll think this is stupid. I just... I don't know, it made me think about you when I looked at I."

She'd thought about a gift. He wondered if she knew how wonderful he thought that was, that she thought of him every once in awhile. He knew he was thinking stupidly, but somehow she managed to do that to him, make him fell stupid, make him act stupid, just like he did in high school.

She handed it to him and watched anxiously as he opened the gift. He let out a laugh as he opened the box of ties, seeing the reindeer one she'd included. Yeah, well, this was Brenda.

She shrugged, not looking at him anymore. "I told you you would think it's stupid."

"I don't think it's stupid. I like it, you know, I need more ties, really. I don't have a reindeer one, it's unique." He liked the gift, he really did. It was funny, it would give Provenza something to talk about.

"Yeah." She giggled. "Well, I've seen how much you love ties. I just loved the reindeer one. Maybe it will help you get a girlfriend."

"I have someone in mind for that, but I don't know if I have a chance." he said. Good God, he had said it out loud, it had just come out, without permission. And he waited. He kept quiet and waited for her response.

She squinted her eyes a bit as to indicating she was trying to make out what he was saying. She tilted her head slightly to the side, then a minute or so later, she swallowed. They locked eyes and there they were, all those feelings both had.

"I want you.", he heard. He wasn't sure if he had really heard it or if it was just his imagination, but when she stepped closer to him, he knew it was true.

The beat of his heart suddenly turned into rapid ones. His pulse was racing, everything inside of him was going fast. He even had butterflies, she gave them to him. Everything they'd been through in the last few years came rushing inside of him, feeling, actions, surroundings, everything, and when her lips met his, it all melted away.

She pressed her lips so hard against his he almost passed out. Her arms were around his neck, pulling her to him, her lips and tongue forcing entry into his mouth.

He wanted to put his arms around her too, but was too surprised to move. He had to do something before she could think he didn't want that and pulled away. The box of ties was still in his hand and he couldn't just drop it on the floor. He put one arm around her waist, pulling her to him. Feeling more of her as he tried to find some place to put the box with his other hand.

It was magic, just wonderful. Like when a person kissed the one you love for the first time. Really kiss, feeling all the passion, feeling all the want, the desire. A rush of relief and happiness went through Andy as he felt her gentle touch on the back of his head.

Somehow they made it to her bedroom and the ties weren't in his hands anymore. He honestly didn't know where they had ended up. Probably somewhere on the floor between the front door and her bedroom door. He really didn't care at that moment. They were kissing once again, lips only leaving each other for seconds to breath and then she was kissing him again. She was so sweet and he could slightly taste the Merlot she'd been drinking.

The next thing he noticed was being on her bed, no clothes between them, nothing. He felt her skin, so soft against his, he thought it was heavenly. He couldn't tell where he ended and she started. When they melted together, their bodies were one and between moans and sighs, soft whispered words, he heard it. He heard the only thing he truly wanted to hear from her.

"What did you say?" he asked, his breath coming out in hard puffs.

She opened her eyes, those eyes he could look at for the rest of his life and not care about anything else. She looked at him surprised and scared at the same time. "Nothing." She whispered, her breath as hard as his. She turned her head to the side, looking away from him and he felt her body stiffening.

He didn't want to make her nervous, not at all. But he had to make sure, needed to know if it was true. "No, say it, again, please." He softly pleaded, not meaning for it to come out as a plea, but he wasn't in control anymore. He put one hand to the side of her head, flattening her cheek, bringing her eyes back to him. "Say it again."

Her eyes locked with his again and then she did something completely unexpected. She started crying. He didn't know why but when she started crying, he knew it was his fault, he'd made her cry.

"Sshhh" He whispered in her ear, trying to comfort her, his elbows resting on the bed, hands cupping her face, making her stay looking at him.

"I can take it back." It came out so softly, just like the sound a scared child's voice when they ask for forgiveness.

He chuckled, trying to break the tension and she looked at him confused. "I don't want you to take it back."

He swore he saw her eyes glistening, shining like the sun, right there in the middle of the dark room. "I'm falling in love with you too." He said seriously, his hands still cupping her face.

She smiled at him, that smile only he knew and he smiled back. She brought her hands to rest softly around his neck, gently pulling him to her, making him stay close enough for her to kiss him

"I love you so much." he said again, he needed to say it again, to make sure that she knew that.

She kissed his face everywhere she could reach and when she finished, she brought his face down, her lips touching his earlobe, her breath tickling his skin as she whispered in his ear "I love you too." Her whispering that sent chills throughout his body, his delight barely being held back.

It was the most amazing sound in the whole world. It was. He would live his whole life just to hear her saying those words. And he would die happy for that.

"Merry Christmas" he whispered in her ear, after looking at the clock and seeing it was morning already. She stirred and looked up at him, smiling brightly. He'd never felt so happy in his entire life as he was waking up next to her.

"Merry Christmas." She said back and kissed his lips softly, resting back on his chest. Her hand gently caressed his skin, making him wish for the millionth time he could stay with her for the rest of his life.

"Andy?" He heard her soft voice.

"Huh?"

"Do you have plans for the New Year?"


End file.
